How to keep your man.

There are a few steps on how to keep your man listed below! Study up girls this is need-to-know stuff!

Step 1~
After the first date, always be sure that you text or call him as soon as you get home- even if he's just dropped you off- just to let him know that you're okay and you DEFINITELY want to go out again, SOON. If he doesn't answer right away he might be ignoring you-so call again. If that doesn't work, hit him up on facebook just to be sure. Repeat this until he answers, and remember you aren't desperate if you're just concerned! Calling him 48 times in less than 30 mins is totally appropriate if you believe he's gotten in an accident from your house to his. You just care!

Step 2~
If he doesn't call you back for glob knows whatever reason don't panic yet- just update your relationship status to "in a relationship" and request him to do the same. If he doesn't accept right away, just post "I love you" with 20 hearts on his wall so people know for sure you guys have a thing.

Step 3~
 After he finally responds to you make it clear that you missed him very much and you want to see him asap. Don't take no for an answer.

Step 4~
Wow! You're officially in a relationship congrats to you! I promise its not out of pity. So the first thing you want to do is get a hold of his phone and delete all of the other girls numbers in it- that includes his family, they might try and give him another girls number- because you never know what they might actually want from him. After all girls and guys cant just be friends you know.

Step 5~
Check his messages as much as possible; e-mail, texts, facebook, and twitter- take no chances. You want to make sure that no girls are texting him. Read through his messages to his guy Friends in case he changed some girls names to guys names. YOU DON'T WANT HIM TEXTING OTHER GIRLS.

Step 6~
Spend every moment of your free time with him. And if he's busy, text him. You don't want him doing anything he shouldn't be.

Step 7~
After he's broken up with you blame the first girl who posts something on his wall. It was probably that sluts fault for his breaking it off.

Step 8~
Stalk him until he either moves or calls the po-po. Then you move on to another man who deserves you!

Step 9~
Repeat the steps above.


Or you could not be a stupid clingy bitch and you know, pull the stick out of your ass. But hey, who does that? Psh! Not me! After all, who wants to have a good relationship?


Thanks for reading! Post a comment and tell me what you thought or tell me on my facebook page "Go f*ck yourself, thanks.". I'm always open to hearing new ideas for something to write! Just tell me in a comment or a post on facebook! Thanks again! ~Cate The Human